Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Enjoy the penises
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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