We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
