also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
