On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
