I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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