she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
