I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
