I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
