Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
