Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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