WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I want to be your penis for a week.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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