How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
