i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
