You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
