One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
this hospital has no fireball
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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