Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
