did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
