Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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