College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
