Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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