Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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