Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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