My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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