I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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