I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
