He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
