after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
