when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I think your dad took our porno
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
