My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize