Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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