Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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