i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
