If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
