Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
