I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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