Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
