All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
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