I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
