You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
