Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
