i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
