I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
