So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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