I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize