butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
