i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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