My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize
