: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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