Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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