VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
