Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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