That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
